Profile & Scouting Report
Years played: All! Even the strike shortened year of 1993.
(Only 2 teams showed up!)
Height: A neck crickin 5 6" with my golf spikes on!
Weight: 130lbs. 5oz. with 2 golf balls (throw downs) in my pocket!
Born: With my brudder Paul. We was spit out
with clubs in hand!
Did not enter draft. I am an original Founding Member. Now holds the G.N.Y.S. title of
"Director of Publicity, Procurement & Mapping".
1999 year Highlights:
Waking up early on "Yoot Saturday" to build an Ark just in
case I needed to put (2) Yoots on board to save the Yoot species from
the deluge of rain. Then, like a sign from above that my courageous
efforts to save the world were not in vain, the power from the staff
of Moses was cast into me and my teammates golf clubs, giving us
the will and power to win the GNYS, forever enshrining us onto Lord
The Long Game:
It's amazing the striking power that is generated from a person that
only stands 4' 8" tall. Taylor Made Golf has just introduced its
Brad Gomez model "Little Man Bubble-Butt" Driver which has the
new graphite shaft incorporating (2) bubbles. The galleries can usually
be heard yelling "Way to go Little Man" right after Mr. Gomez
t-bones one of his drives.
The Short Game:
The first person on the GNYS Tour to use a Carbite Putter. Since their
overwhelming victory last year and the whispering among the huge
galleries following this group and witnessing their awesome putting
power, 50% of players in the 2000 GNYS have thought about changing
putters. One player has.
What about the enemies?
People are probably just jealous of me because I have the cup, my
Carbite putter, & really cool teammates that can golf mach 1. Does
that make them my enemies?
Barring any meteorological catastrophes from asteroid impacts on earth,
Lake Huron tidal waves, Solar Flares that melt the polar ice pack, F5
twisters in October, earthquakes of #10 magnitude on the Richter scale
at Thunder Bay resort, heavy lava flows from an undiscovered volcano in
Gaylord, Ben-Wa & the Balls will REPEAT as champions to become the
1st GNYS champions of the new millennium.
SOURCE: Yoot Shoot Questionnaire